Flashbacks
by WeirdsBestFriend
Summary: Zuko can't help but feel sad while living on Ember island, even when he's with the gaang. He keeps having flashbacks,getting angry, and feeling sick. What's wrong with Zuko? Based during Sozin's Comet.
1. Normal

**_Preface_**

Katara turned around as she suddenly heard a sound of glass breaking. The horrible smash and then the short crunching of it as it sounded like it was being squeezed like a can. She ran from the courtyard into the house. Looking around she opened a door and saw him. His eyes as gold as the sun, they held such determination. Such pain. They looked as if they were fire there very self.

The water that flowed from the fiery eyes was only but half of the pain that needed to be released. She looked at what had been broken and her own blue eyes flowed then.

Her very own eyes began to stream with sparkling tears down her face.

**1. Normal**

The dusty air greeted his nose as he awoke and yawned slightly and stretched. Three AM, his usual wake-up. The fire-bender arose and began his usual morning routines such as bathing, and cleaning his own clothes good and drying them quickly and then slipping them back on as he brushed his teeth quickly. His hair simply fell into it's place perfectly.

He looked into the reflection on a piece of metal once he walked into the hallway. He put a finger on the scar and then felt his sopping wet hair.

_' You always had such nice hair Zuko..' _

He shook his head. There was no point on dwelling what his mother said. He stood looking into his reflection again. He looked like his mother. But then again he looked like his father, that's something he never wanted to look like.

_' It is not good to dwell on the past, but it is good to remember them and what good they had done or said. ' _

He walked down the hall as his Uncles words rang in his ear drums. He had to admit. His Uncle was right, it wasn't good to dwell on the past at all but it _was_ good to remember. At the time that his Uncle had said all his little riddles and sayings, he payed no attention, now he even understood some of what he said.

By some, he meant about two percent of all the sayings he had practically preached. Most of which his own Uncle had made up by himself.

" He should of been a philosopher or something.." Zuko mumbled as he stepped out into the bitter cold of the very early morning and waited for the scorching heat of the day.

It was four AM and it was still dark. No sun in sight. Maybe it wouldn't be so hot today and him and Aang could get some more fire bending training in.

He folded his arms across his chest and looked up at the moon, expecting something to happen almost. He sighed and returned back inside the warm house. He remembered staying in this house as a kid.

_' Zuko! Slow down child! ' His mother laughed as she tried to catch up with her only son. _

_' Faster mom! Come on! Were almost to the beach! ' _

_' All that child is interested in is the **beach**..nothing like Azula..' His father would say behind his back. _

_' Azula is an..odd..child. ' His mother would reply. _

_' I was just like her, I see myself in her very much. ' _

_' Zuko is a bright boy..' _

_' Bright doesn't mean he could beat someone in a fight! ' _

_' Fighting isn't the only answer Ozai! ' _

_' Arguing I see. ' Azula snuck up on them. _

_' Go play with your brother Azula. ' Ursa told her daughter. _

_' Fine..' Azula would sigh and run off, only to tell Zuko that his parents were fighting over if they were going to kill him, or give him away and couldn't decide between the two choices. _

_' No! That's not true! ' Zuko would scream to mostly himself to reassure himself of his parents love. _

_' Oh naive brother, it truly is. ' _

_Zuko then almost began to cry at the very thought of his mother or father wanting to disown or kill him. _

_' Your such a **baby**, all you need to do is simply..run away. ' Azula told him with a flick of her wrist to support the idea of it being so easy. _

That was the night Zuko had run away and his parents, or rather mother, fund him later that night in a cave close to the ocean. Not that best hiding spot, he had to admit.

The _only_ bad memory he had while staying on Ember Island was that one. The other memories? All happiness. _That's_ why there were so few of them.

Zuko looked through the window outside again and saw that this time the sun was out. The sun was clearly in the sky and everyone was clearly groaning as they woke up slowly.

Zuko could only smirk. If he didn't smirk then the emotions he would show were sadness, hurt, and pain on his very face.

he heard the creaking of a door behind him and open up slowly. He heard a hand being placed on the wooden frame of the door tiredly, right behind him.

" Seriously..I have no idea how you get up this..." Sokka started and then yawned. " early.."

Zuko smirked again, he didn't have to turn around to notice that Sokka was right behind him.

" I don't know how you get up this_ late_. " Zuko bit back.

".....Seriously....you are one weird teenager..."

Zuko smiled but when Sokka left he frowned. He had always been weird. he was never.._normal_.

Zuko walked away from this hall and put a hand on his head. What was wrong with him this morning? Why was he in such a bad and depressing mood today? More then usual?

He decided to try and shake off the feeling. He would have to train with Aang soon! He couldn't let himself be upset or angry when fire bending! It would be fatal. Dangerous. Suicide! The only time you could ever be any other emotion then determined, happy, or neutral, was when you were fighting someone you wanted....

**Dead.**

He remembered how much anger was within his father when he had scarred his face. Zuko once again shrugged off all these thoughts quickly.

He looked down the other hallway he was in at the moment as he watched more people..correction...his _friends_ come out of there perspective rooms.

At least he had one good flash back this morning. It was of the first night they had stayed in his fathers house. Of Course Zuko had been having some nightmares due to him living or rather '_temporarily staying' _at his father house and such, but it was hilarious how they rest of them reacted.

He remembered Aang, the _Avatar _coming into his room in the middle of night asking if his father had any traps of any kind in the house, he was scared to death. Sokka came in a little bit later too.

Sokka had asked if the house was safe to stay in and then went rambling on about how this house could be cursed with the fire-lord living in it. Then he realized he was talking about my father and said a sorry in a tiny mouse-like voice.

Zuko almost laughed at this thought. Katara had woken up the next morning with dark circles under her eyes due to lack of sleep and so had Suki, Sokka's girlfriend.

" Hey! Zuko! Are you gonna just stand there all day!? " Toph yelled to the fire-bending teenager.

Zuko, taken out of his thoughts immediately, turned around and looked at the younger earth-bender.

" How long.." Zuko drawled, meaning to ask '_how long have you been standing there?' _

" Long enough to know that you need to move or your feet are going to grown into the ground. " Toph replied sarcastically and moved on her way to what seemed to be the kitchen or dining room.

Zuko smiled a little and turned around all the way, he walked off into the courtyard deciding he wasn't very hungry for breakfast, took a breath in and, let a huge flame come out of his very palm.

He was calm enough to fire bend..

_For now._

**Hope you like! More chapters are to come when you simply just review! (: Thanks! (: **


	2. Anger

**2. Anger**

Zuko stepped twice to the left and threw his arm out as fire spurted out wildly from his palm.

" Alright.." Aang said softly and took a deep breath.

Aang stepped twice to the left and threw his arm out. Fire spurted out, but not as wildly. It was like a big flame that emitted from something evil, but then again, fire was life, so it was also good. Aang decided that Fire bending, was just overly complicated.

The flame had been big but not as big as Zuko's had been. Not as_ ferocious_.

" Yeah Aang! You can do it! " Sokka scream from the steps next to Suki.

Suki giggled and so did Katara. Toph smiled a little continued watching even though she completely blind.

" Stronger! " Zuko demanded.

It sounded so mean, demanding, and determined, but that was simply Zuko's way of being nice, kind, and gentle. It was his very _own_ special way of teaching. Like Katara and Toph, he had to find his own way in teaching the avatar bending.

" I'm trying! " Aang said back, not meanly but rather in a slightly disturbed way.

" Not hard enough! " Zuko screamed back frustrated.

Zuko turned around from facing Aang and rubbed the back of his neck. He wasn't trying to be mean or anything, he was just worried. What if Aang didn't beat his father because Zuko couldn't teach him well enough or Aang didn't try hard enough!?

That was a ridiculose thought though, of course the _Avatar_ would at least try his hardest to be able to win against the worlds most evil man on the face of the earth!

_' I say you set all there hope and land on fire and crush it all. ' Azula said to her father smartly while twisting a piece of her hair around. _

' Yes..yes! Your right Azula! ' His father yelled out.

Zuko was ignored as he told them that wasn't what he was trying to say. Zuko closed his eyes and hunched over, the last words he had payed any attention to was the simple word ' Supreme ruler ' 

Zuko cringed inside his mind.

" Let's try again. " Zuko said softer this time as he turned around.

" Okay. " Aang said putting a small smile of forgiveness on his face.

Aang stepped twice and shot fire out of his hand again, this flame was a little more powerful, and slightly bigger.

" The whole key in fire bending is to unlock all your chi. " Zuko said trying to be helpful calmer.

" My chi. " Aang repeated and nodded his head once in understanding.

" Exactly, once you step once, focus on your chi coming from your stomach, up out of you and through your arm, make sure to try and unlock all of your fire and willpower. " Zuko told him as he demonstrated as he stepped once and then twice, as he released his arm, he let out a loud yell and fire shot out.

" Okay! " Aang whispered excitedly.

He stepped twice and this time, the fire was even more stronger. The power of the flame was very forceful. It still wasn't as good as Zuko's, but with some more time and practice he would be bale to get it down pat soon.

Unfortunately, Zuko didn't see this beautiful, well formed and powerful flame. No he saw his father in his mind.

_' Please Father! I only had the fire nations best intrest at heart! I'm sorry I spoke out of turn! ..' Zuko pleaded not to fight his own father. _

_' You will fight for your honor! ' His father yelled back. _

_' I meant no disrespect..I am your loyal son..' _

_' Raise and fight Prince Zuko! ' _

_' I won't fight you. '_

_' You **will** learn respect..and suffering will be your teacher..' _

_His father stepped two times and thrusted his arm out, fire came out powerfully, right into his left eye. _

_' AHHHH! ' Zuko screamed and let the pain flood his body mercilessly, he thought he deserved it. _

_His father gave a sick and twisted smile, Zuko could see it when he opened his eyes for the few brief seconds after being burned, before passing out. _

Zuko gulped and took a step back. He heard his laughter and almost could see himself running across this very courtyard. Zuko rubbed his eyes and then looked again.

Gone.

" Zuko?...Zuko?? " Aang asked.

" Huh? Oh.." Zuko replied and then he felt the anger rise inside of him.

His father.

He just realized what flashback he had just had. It was the flashback of being scarred, burned, and banished. It was the flashback of being unloved, hated, and despised. The flashback of horror, fear, and tragedy. The flash of his father.

Zuko gritted his teeth and made a soft, quiet, growling deep in his throat.

Zuko turned around on his heel forcefully and started to storm off forcefully.

" Let's take a break. " Zuko said angrily.

" What? " Aang asked blinking, unsure of what just happened.

Zuko clenched his fists and raised his shoulders in anger as he stopped in his tracks. He sighed out and closed his eyes.

" I'm sorry, I can't train you right now. " Zuko said calmly but very seriously.

" Why not? " Aang asked.

" BECAUSE I CAN'T RIGHT NOW! " Zuko screamed and let out a loud growl before storming off inside the house.

Katara gave a very surprised and confused look as did the others.

" What's wrong with him? " Katara asked.

" Oh you know, 16 year olds and there moods...there all real complicated, can't ever tell what they're thinking! They can get real happy and then all the sudden, _' BAM! ' _there all angry or depressed. " Toph said outloud.

Everyone gave her a look of completle surprise on her knowing so much on a topic such as this.

" What? I can _feel_ your stares you know, just 'cause I'm blind doesn't mean I can't _feel_. " Toph said outloud.

" Nothing! Nothing! " Sokka said and putting his hands up in defense.

" Toph is right, he's probably just easily disturbed or something today. Just let him get some breathing room. He get's angry easily anyway. " Katara said, smiling.

" Yeah. Okay. " Aang grinned from ear ro ear and sat down next to Katara.

* * *

" WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!? " Zuko screamed as he stormed out of the front door of the house and slammed it shut.

He began trudging down the dirt road and sloshing through the sand. The place on the beach he was at was completely deserted. This was the side of the beach everyone despised and stayed away from.

He remebered his mother telling him to stay away from over here as a kid, it was very close to black sharp rocks that protruded out slightly, the water lapped roughly at the side of it and made it look dangerous, just like his mind.

He looked at the rocks, fiercly his eyes glared at them. In his mind the water turned into fire, the sharp rocks turned into his face. But who would last longer? The fire that burned him or himself taking the pain?

His eyes went into little slits as he thought about this. What would last longer? Himself? Or his father and Azula?

He took a careful step in the sand and felt the grains push inbetween his toes. He began to walk faster and faster until he reached the large rock and climbed on to the top.

It was amazing how much you could see from a simple rock, he looked out at the ocean. Maybe this is exactly what he needed, just some time away from everything, everyone, and all his thoughts and memories. Just a brief moment to be calm and at restful peace.

The waves lapping made his breathing go into a slow and calm rhythm. He sat criss cross until the tide began to come in. He looked down at the water that seemed to be lapping harder against the rock now, trying to force it's way through.

The water splash high up onto his face, the dry part of the rock Zuko had been sitting on suddenly turned into a slippery wet spot.

Zuko slid and grabbed a piece of dry protruding rock from behind him as he slipped and vut his foot on a piece of rock.

" Ahrg! " Zuko let out a short and slightly quiet scream.

He practically shreded his knees as he clambered back up the sharp rock and tried to get off. The salt water that just kept coming up higher made it even more slippery and he kept re-slicing his already deep cuts and the salt just made them burn worse then ever.

Zuko winced as he finally jumped off the rock, or rather fell off, into the sand beside him. He let his head hit the sand and he breathed out as he felt parts of his hair was wet. He sighed out yet again and closed his eyes. The sand entered his cuts on his knees and big one on his foot. He hissed and tried to stand up.

He groaned badly and began to walk. He tried to pretend like nothing was wrong. But all along he knew that there was something wrong and it's wasnt just his cut up legs and feet. It was his mind. His mental state.

_' The boy's crazy! ' _

_' His name is ZUKO! ZUKO! Not "the boy"! ' _

_His mother yelled out of turn in her favor and was smacked across the face by his fathers hand. Zuko closed his eyes as he heard the mighty crack of his dads hand across his mothers cheek. _

_He had been standing there in the doorway the whole time, watching and observing his parents fight about him. _

_' Don't talk to me like that! ' His father screamed, pointing a finger in his mothers face. _

_' Y-yes Ozai..' _

_His father snarled at her and looked away stubbornly. _

_' You must realize, Zuko is such a good boy he's just..just..well..he's not like other boys..he rough, he's entergetic and stubborn at times..he's angry a lot and sometimes he can be dangerous! But Zuko..he's..he's not just that..he underatands things...more then you know Ozai..he understands so many things that aren't even his level...he understands you duties as a fire lord and mine as a mother and wife..he understands his place as a child but tends to understand so many things we might not even realize are true..' _

_' What like world peace!? ' _

_' No, like..like grown up things! Such as marriage, divorce, depression, happiness, wealth, power..Power...Azula may reach for power but Zuko..Zuko is afraid of it, I can see it in his eyes! He's afraid once he has power he wont be able to control it! I know he understands it all! ' _

_' Your talking gibberish woman! ' _

_' No! I'm talking the truth Ozai! Your son wants to grow up to be like you! Why wont you open your arms to him!? Why wont you be a father!? ' _

_' Because, Ursa! He's no son of mine if he's afraid of being the Fire-lord! If he doesn't want to be the fire-lord then I disown him and Azula will be first in line for the throne! ' _

_' How can you say something so horrible Ozai!? ' _

_' It's only the truth, now get out of my SIGHT! ' _

Zuko fell to the ground, he caught himself with his hands as his knees fell straight onto the ground, he felt a trickle down his back as ice cold water fell from the sky. It had been clear this morning. And now it rains. Figures.

He breathed in and out as he blinked away all the flash backs.

_' You see the horizon? ' His father asked as he pointed out at the sun setting as he stood ontop of a hill with his sun, hand on around his shoulders. _

_' Yes. ' Zuko replied happily. _

_' The fire nation base is right there, you see it? The black speck? ' _

_' N-No..' _

_" **I** do father..it's the second fire nation base ever built, correct? ' Azula said smartly. _

_His father smiled. _

_' Correct Azula. ' _

_His father took his arm off from Zuko's shoulders and his other arm onto Azula's shoulders warmly. _

Zuko let out a short gasp of sadness, trying to surpress the building tears.

_' Zuko, leave, I'm busy. ' His father commaned as soon as Zuko had come into the fire-lords office. _

_' S-Sorry father..' Zuko muttered and began to walk out. _

_Azula walked right ahead of him and into the room. _

_' Father? Father, I need some help with my bending practice. ' _

_' Hm? Azula? Oh, alright, what do you need? ' His father replied so calmly to Azula. _

_Zuko looked in awe at what he saw. He hung his head lowly and left as Azula began to spar. _

Zuko tried to tell himself none of it mattered now, but he knew it did.

_' Ready to go young Zuko? ' His uncle asked with a giant smile on his face. _

_' Ready Uncle Iroh! ' Zuko replied optimistically, very young at his current age, _

_' Alrighty then! ' _

_They strolled down slowly to the beach, Zuko's uncle walking at a very slow pace to the five year old Zuko. _

_' Uncle Iroh! Walk faster, faster, faster! ' _

_His Uncle laughed and tried to walk a little faster. _

_' Why wouldn't father come with me? ' Zuko asked after a moment of silence between the older man and his very young nephew. _

_His Uncle tried to think up a lie. he couldn;t Zuko that his father obviously did not like him even though that was the total truth, iroh would never say that to a child or anyone of any age as a matter of fact. _

_' He has been busy lately.' _

All of it had been lies. None of it had been true.

_' Zuko! ' _

His mother.

_' ZUKO! ' _

His father.

_' Zuzu..'_

His sister.

_' Zuko? ' _

His Uncle.

_' Zuko. ' _

All of them.

Zuko let out an angry scream and then stood up slowly. He put a finger to his face as he felt a tear run down. He whipped it away harshly, after feeling the room-temperature liquid's texture.

He made sure he was completely fine enough to enter the house. Then with a sniff, he opened the door, put on his mask of normality, and tried to make his way to his own room without being noticed.

He tip-toed down the hallway, slowly making his way to his room. He reached his hand out to touch the handle of his old door when a sudden light flickered on behind him.

" Where were you?! " Katara yelled with her arms folded and a glare on her face.

Zuko didn't turn around although he had a look of surprise on his face. he couldn't let them see the cuts he had on his hands and knees, he didn't know why he didn't want to show them though. It had been something he had done ven as a child. When he was hurt, he tried to hide it. Zuko couldn't even figure out why he didn it himself!

He thought maybe it was just because he didn't believe anyone could be good enouh to actually heal him or maybe it was out of fear that others would get mad at him.

" What? " Zuko asked confused.

" Where were you!? We've all been worried sick! " Katara yelled to him.

_' Zuko, where have you been all day my nephew!? ' His uncle yelled as Zuko walked into the camp site. _

_' Out. ' He replied coldly. _

_' Zuko, I've been worried sick about you! I thought some one had found out who you were, I was just about to leave to go and find you! ' _

Zuko never really understood what Uncle meant by him being worried about him being gone for a measly two hours, he didn't understand why anyone would worry about him, Zuko.

But now he started to get the concept a little. But still..he had to ask.

" Why? " Zuko asked.

" Why!? What do you mean why!? We thought you were hurt, or kidnapped! When you joined this group and proved you were trust worthy, we took you as part of our family, we care about you, and we don't want anything happen to you. I know it's a little foolish for us to be worrying about you with your fire bending and everything but..but we still have to think of the possibilities and..we all just care about you Zuko. " Katara began to a very angry voice but it chilled to a very soothing and explanatory voice.

" I was just done at the beach.." Zuko replied, still facing his door with his head down a little.

Katara was silent for a moment. Zuko didn't know what to do now. The akward silence went on for another minute or two, it surronded them.

" Zuko, wh wont you face us? Is there something wrong? " Katara asked.

" No."

" Then turn around. "

Zuko closed his eyes and turned around.

" So you **ARE **hurt!? " Katara screamed.

Zuko didn't reply, he opened his eyes and saw that Katara eyes were red and full of anger but concern, they were still teary too. Sokka was standing beside her and was grimacing at the sight of Zuko's deep cuts in his knees, Aang gave a look of concern too while TOph stood there with a look of concentration, almost like she didn't understand something. Suki was holding her head, not being able to bea the sight of the blood running down Zuko's arms and knees.

Zuko looked down at his knees, his eyes went wide and then he held out his arms. The front of them had tiny streams of blood going down them. Invisible when he was turned around, they met at the very tip of his fingers.

Zuko gave a look of concentration too, the blood was as red as his fire was.

Katara sighed and took Zuko lighty by the shoulder.

" What's wrong with you today Zuko? " She whispered and walked with her hand still on his shoulder.

He folloed along behind her silently but obdiently. He couldn't figure himself out today either.

_' Sometimes to understand, the truth can only lie in the hardest spots to find i and sometimes when you bottle your emotions up too long, the bottle suddenly can't hold anymore of your emotions and it crack, slowly, chip by chip it will break until it breaks completely in half and then there is **no** way to repair it. ' _

Zuko remebered the wise words and shut his eyes as he thought about his brave, old Uncle. What was happening to him? What was he becoming? Why was all this happening now?

**Please Review! Were going to see a lot of sadness and flashbacks next chapter! **


	3. Distress

**3. Distress**

The soothing water washed over the fire bender's body. His eyes closed, he felt ever drop of where exactly the liquid went to.

" How did you manage to get these gashes Zuko? " Katara asked with a worried and astonished tone.

Zuko didn't answer but instead stayed silent with his eyes closed forcefully and lying on the soft bed in Katara's room, it was like an eclipse. His eyes being shut was like the entire sun was gone.

" Zuko? How did you get these? " Katara asked more forecully this time.

Zuko looked at her with a sad and almost desperate look for her to leave the subject be.

" I'm _not_ going to just let this go Zuko! This is serious! " Katara yelled aggravated, reading his expression of silence.

Zuko still didn't answer, and turned his head to the side.

There was a moment of silence between them. Zuko finally turned his head again, looking at her and then opened his mouth. He closed it again, thinking of the wrong words to use. He opened again and shut it once more.

" Fine.." He finally replied softly with his voice cracking horribly.

Katara looked at him, waiting for him to explain as she continued to heal his many cuts and gashes on his knees. They were horrible with the many shards of rocks and lose pebbles nestled inside of them. She couldn't even begin to understand how Zuko could stand it.

" I got them when I was down on the beach..on the rocks.." Zuko answered, his voice still cracking as Katara noted.

" Why were you on those rocks? " Katara asked with a tone.

" I guess..I was ust so angry..I wasn't thinking straight..I was just..I...I don't know. " Zuko admitted.

The graceful water bender gave a sympathetic look as she looked right into his golden, firebender, eyes.

" These cuts are so deep..how did you get them from just being on those rocks? " Katara asked, holding in the many lectuers on how badly hurt or even worse, died being on those rocks.

" The water came up where I was sitting..and I..slipped..." Zuko whispered and turned his head to look at the wall on the other side of the room.

Honestly, he looked anywhere _but _Katara. he didn't want to also tell her about the break down he had. He was trying to stay far away from that topic, but he was beginning to lose all sense of being coherent

" How could you of been-!...I..I mean..we should work on getting these wounds patched up and..you need to be under a blanket, it sounds like your catching a cold.." Katara was risen with anger but then calmed down and started to stutter in a cool soothing voice.

" I..I didn't mean for any of this to happen, I didn't mean to get so.._angry_ it's just.." Zuko began and then closed his eyes.

Katara's attention had now been caught.

" Just what? " She asked softly hoping to get some answers for his sudden mood changes.

" it's just...just nothing.." Zuko finally sighed and opened his eyes slowly once again, gripping the blankets on the bed.

Katara looked at him for a moment more and then bowed her head down trying to meet his gaze anymore as she finished the final gash on his legs and knees. She wiped her forehead and brow which had started to get soaked with sweat which was caused by concentration.

She reached her hand out and took his hand, holding onto it she placed her own hand on his palm and traced her healing fingers up in arm. Erasing the small scratches that ran down his arms like small stream into his skin.

" Alright, you rest, and i'll get you something to eat.." She smiled in a warm way.

Zuko gave a disgusted look at the mention of food.

" You need to eat something, if you don't your just going to get even sicker! " Katara exclaimed.

She took the extra blanket that was layed neatly underneath the bed and placed it softly on top of him and pushed it up to his shoulders and let it set it softly there.

She put her hand on his shoulder and looked into his golden eyes.

" If something wrong, you _need_ to tell us Zuko, in this group..no.._family_, we _tell_ each other things. "

And with that she left him and went to go and get something for him to eat.

_0_

Katara breathed out as she closed the door behind her and walked away from the room slowly, but it wasn't long before she was met with worried eyes down the hall.

" How is he? " Aang asked worriedly.

" Well, I healed all the scrapes, cuts, and even gashes but he should rest for a while, he doesn't look so good.." Katara replied in full honesty.

" Were not _**just**_ talking about him being _physically_ unhealthy, are we? " Toph asked seriously which in her way, being serious was a way to show an expression of worry.

Katara looked at her with her mouth slightly open in uneasy surprise. She closed her eyes sadly and looked away.

" He's getting a cold and he just seems to be a little..I don't know...suddenly saddened, or..maybe uneased by something, maybe he just needs some sleep.. "

Toph looked at the hallway where the room Zuko was currently laying in came from.

Katara looked forward and began to go into the kitchen to get Zuko some tea and soup, it would at least help him feel a little better.

Right?

_0_

Zuko lied in silence, gripping the sheets and biting the inside of his lip. He lied on his side, looking at the wall uncomfortably. He looked around and noticed something. He thought this had been _katara's_ room, it wasn't Katara's room at all.

_0_

Katara went outside to the courtyard, noticing that all there dishes were dirty in the kitchen. She went outside and barely found what she had been looking for with it being so dark out. It seemed like it was almost impossible to see with the suffocating darkness that surrounded her body.

But she found them.

At lunch time, they had all forgotten to bring there bowls back in when they had started to worry about Zuko, she walked over to them and bent down to pick them up carefully, but then she stopped..

Katara turned around as she suddenly heard a sound of glass breaking. The horrible smash and then the short crunching of it as it sounded like it was being squeezed like a can. She ran from the courtyard into the house. Looking around she opened a door and saw him. His eyes as gold as the sun, they held such determination. Such pain. They looked as if they were fire they're very self.

The water that flowed from the fiery eyes was only but half of the pain that needed to be released. She looked at what had been broken and her own blue eyes flowed then.

Her very own eyes began to stream with sparkling tears down her face.

It was a picture of Azula, Ozai, Ursa, and him all together. A family photo with them smiling, happily.

Or was it all _fake _smiles?

He leaned back, not even noticing her sudden entry. It was like he was in his own world of hate, anger and despair at the moment. Not aware of anything around him.

" Zuko.." Katara whispered.

She went up to him and put a hand on his arm.

" Zuko? Zuko, can you understand me? " Katara asked now a little paranoid.

His eyes searched around the room until they finally met her face, but his expression didn't change. It was still the same..

Full of remorse and distress. Nothing but pain.

His golden eyes turned into a sudden emotion of blank-ness and then they just went into a look of pain again, a look of mental or emotional hurt. He looked so sad..

He looked at the wall again in sudden interest.

She moved her hand down to his hand and moved the hand so that she could see the many shards of glass. She grimaced.

It was such a bloody and gory sight.

" Doesn't that hurt? " She murmured but he didn't seem to take any notice.

She took some water from the pouch around her waist and used it to flow over his hands, taking the shards of glass out more carefully then she could of ever done it, it healed his scratches good enough so he wouldn't be in too much pain if he could feel it at all. She stood up carefully and then glaced at him as she began to walk out the door.

She turned down the hallway carefully, it was almost five O'clock in the morning by now. She noted that everyone had gone to bed. Lazy. She would of laughed at the thought had this not been such a serious time.

She went into the bathroom that was closest to the room Zuko was currently in. She got out some bandaging and walked briskly back to them room, she was a little nervous about what he could be doing in there from the last events that had taken place.

She walked in carefully and then mentally noted yet another thing. She noted that everything was perfectly fine except for the hurt fire bender under the covers.

She came up close to Zuko and took his hand, and wrapped the bandages around his torn up palms and fingers.

She sighed out relaxed at last, content that everything was fine. Well..almost.

" Don't ever do that again! " She whispered but in a sharp tone.

Obviously reffering to the previous action of smashing glass in his hands.

A single tear rolled down the water benders cheek, leaving a wet, glistening track behind it.

He didn't make a move to talk or speak but simply wore the look of pain. The look of misery. The look of despair. The look of absolute distress.

A strand of stray hair made it way in front of Katara's closed eyes, and tickled her cheek. She sniffed once and opened her eyes, pushing the piece back with her fingers she looked at the young miserable prince, his eyes were half closed.

" Go to sleep..you'll feel better.." Katara whispered to him.

"...I don't think i'll ever feel better.." Zuko whispered back with a pained expression in his eyes, the tears welled up inside, ready to spill any moment.

Katara put a hand on Zuko's arm. " Sleep.." She whispered to him.

He looked at her and then looked away again.

She put a finger on his already drooping eyelids, she ran her finger down once and that's all it took for him to close his eyes completely and fall into a deep sleep.

She watched as his mouth opened slightly and he went limp. He was finally calm.

She looked down at him for a moment just before leaving the room. She turned all the lights off in the room before she left and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.

With one final sigh out she walked to her own room, hoping to get some sleep even though she knew she wouldn't. She would worry to much about Zuko.

_' What's wrong with him? ' _Katara asked herself in her head.

And with that question in her head, she looked up at the celling in her room the whole night, thinking the question over and over.

But no matter how much she thought about it, no matter how much she tried to answer, no matter _how _much she tried to describe it, she couldn't find the answer to what could possibly be wrong with the young fire bender.

_0_

Next Chapter will be up soon! Please review!! (: (: (:


	4. Drained

**4. Drained**

The chill of morning came. The odd quietness overtook the big house and silence along with worry seemed to nestle in everyones hearts.

Katara stood up as the suns rays entered the house. She rubbed her dark circled eyes and yawned. Out of all the hours that she had gotten availibal to herself that night, which was only about three hours at the most, she had only gotten one hours of rest, not even sleep. Not that Katara was complaining.

She was up, walking to Zuko's room and entering within a minute. She looked inside, ready to see something horrible but all she saw was the fire bender, curled up in a ball on the bed with the blanket still on him but down to waist now.

SHe watched as shivered for a second and curled up tighter into a ball. She gave a relieved and sympathetic smile as she walked over to his sleeping form quietly.

She sat down careully next to his sleeping body on the bed and brought the blanket back up to his neck. She put a hand on his arm and found herself rubbing it in a vertical line soothingly.

She noticed herself doing so and remebered her own mother doing the same for her. She watched as Zuko began to stir awake as he rolled out of the fetal position and into a flat form again.

She gave a slightly worried smile as he breathed in and opened his eyes awake.

_' Death? You fear death? Well don't..it happenes to all of us..sometimes it lands upon others sooner for their stupidity. ' Ozai said with venom dripping out of his mouth. _

_Zuko looked at him in fear. _

_' O-Ozai..are you sure you should be..should be telling this to..to a eleven year old boy? ' Ursa, his mother asked _

_' Shut up you beastly woman! ' _

_' Y-Yes dear..' _

_' As long as I'm his father and firelord, I will decide what is best for my son! ' _

_' Y-yes dear..' _

Zuko held his head as the headache from the flashbacks began to come on to him, gripping his hair tightly, clenching his teeth and eyes closed he didn't even sit up at all.

Katara gave him a worried look but didn't try to embarrass him. The motherly instincts inside her couldn't help it though, she was worried and he wasn't looking better then he had last night.

She reached out and put the back her hand on his forehead.

" _Now_ your sick.." Katara murmured.

Zuko coughed once and shivered a little under the thick blanket.

She put a hand on his arm and looked at him a for a short moment before talking.

" Do you need anything? I'm going to go get Aang to go and get some medicine for you.." Katara asked him softly.

He didn't make a move to answer at all and he just curled up in fetal position all over again.

" Where do you hurt? " Katara asked him, not being able to take the look of constant pain on his face.

Zuko just gave a aoft, quiet groan.

Katara put her hand on uhis forehead and pushed back some hair that was sticking to his sweaty face.

She nodded once and tip-toed quietly out of the room.

_0_

" Okay, I'll be back in just a few minutes! " Aang exclaimed promisingly as he ran from the doorway at top speed.

Katara stood there, the wind blowing her dress and her hair to the left as she saw him make a left towards the small town with his disguise on.

She nodded once in approval and stepped back inside, closing the door.

When she went back in however she saw Toph standing at the end of the hallway, rubbing one arm with her hand nervously.

" Toph. " Katara began as she came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. " You can see him if you want, I don't think he's contagious. "

She turned around and glared at her. " Who said I was even worried! "

Katara gave a smile and turned around, walking away but before she was all the way gone, she turned around and watched as Toph nervously took a step and finally walked into the room.

Katara couldn't help but be nosy. She walked up to the door to and bit her lip as she put her ear to the door forcefully and listened.

_0_

" I heard that your really sick.." Toph said quietly as she sat down on the bed next ot Zuko.

Zuko didn't even open his eyes. He was incoherent anyway.

"..I don't tell the others this really..but I'm..worried about you.."

Zuko opened an eye and squinted as he tried to figure out who she was.

" Hey.." Toph smiled at the opened eyes, maybe she couldn't see him open his eyes, but she could feel his new gaze.

" Hey..w-why are you in here? " Zuko asked now knowing who was in here.

" I wanted to talk to you..."

" Is somebody sick? " Ziko asked in a scratchy but soft and confused voice.

" Yeah..somebody's really sick. " Toph answered him.

Zuko looked at her through fevered eyes, listening to her just talk. Just to hear her voice..

" When you had gotten angry and_ left_ the other night...and it started to rain...I was worried about you then too...when we found you with the..with the blood running down.." Toph stopped suddenly.

She turned her head and wiped away a stray tear that had fallen.

" Stupid tears! " She muttered sharply. " Well when I saw the blood just running down everywhere...I thought you were gonna die..I really did...and now your really sick and I.."

" I'm not gonna die. " Zuko said starting to come out of the feverish haze a little.

Toph's eyes opened a little bigger now and her mouth opened just slightly in surprise, she swallowed and let her white blind eyes rest on him.

" Promise? " She asked softly.

He nodded once and smiled softly. A sudden memory came by him as he stared at the celing, one that he didn't wish to remember.

_' I promise I'll come back Zuko! Don't worry! ' His mtoher called as she left the palace with a small smile set on her beautiful red lips. _

_' Promise? ' Zuko asked. _

_She nodded once and continued to smile as she left the palace, closing the doors behind her. _

_His mother had to go onto a small trip with his father, the firelord, to a meeting about taking in some hostages or something of the sort. _

_The next morning when Zuko had woken up he walked out of his bedroom and saw Azula smirking like a cat. _

_' So sorry..mother died while at the meeting..' _

_' But she promised she would come back! ' _

_' Not all prmoises can be kept..' _

_His uncle finally had interfered since he was babysitting them and had stopped the quarrel, reassuring a crying Zuko that his mother was infact not dead. _

Zuko shut his eyes and breathed in sharply, the rooms door suddenly burst open and both Aang and Katara fell over inside. Toph turned her head and gave a incredulous look.

" Got the medicine! " Aang shouted with joy in his heart and smile on his face to match.

Aang looked at Zuko with a smile as he stood up and walked over to him. He reached into a little brown bag and took out a small bottle with red liquid inside.

" Oh yeah! _He_ get's some '_yummy cherry flavored medicine_ while _we_ had to suck on frozen _toads_! " Sokka yelled with his arms folded in noticeable aggervation.

No one payed him any mind though. It looked like Zuko had been completely drained by now. His skin was paler then it had ever been before, his eyes didn't seem to hold any energy in them and he was laying so limp on the bed that you would of thoguht he was dead.

His eyes had shut closed a few moments before Aang had entered and his mouth was clenched tightly shut.

Aang face went into one of joy into one of worry and sympathy. He bent down onto one knee and took the medication's top off carefully. He held Zuko's head up softly and let the ruby red medicine flow down his mouth and down his throat.

Aang lifted the medicine back up as Zuko chocked slightly and waited until he had stopped choking to resume giving him his medicine like a small child.

When the medicine had finally been drank to as much as Zuko could hold without throwing up, Aang set Zuko's fevered head back down onto the pillows and put the blanket around him.

_0_

Zuko didn't speak for the rest of that day or the next day. He refused to eat and all he could manage to do when asked to speak was a simple small moan of pain.

Katara went inside his room on the third day of his sudden depression and raised him up forcefully, he gave her a look of loathing and confusion but he didn't make any move to talk.

" Zuko. " She demanded for his attention.

He looked at her through bleary eyes, his eyelids half closed and incoherent. A perfect poker face.

" What's wrong with you! You've been acting like..like..**_this_** for almost four days! " Katara yelled concerned.

His eyes went into a deep emotion of remorse and he looked away as he closed his eyes.

" Zuko..please_..__talk_ to us.."

He looked back at her but he didn't talk. He wouldn't say a word. He wouldn't mutter a single thing. All he could think of was his fathers words on his thirteenth birthday.

_' Another birthday..another day you get older and I begin to die..another day **you** come closer to dying as well my son..another day is just another step into deaths door...just one less day you get to live..' _

Zuko swallowed the sob he had in his throat and bit his lip to fight the oncoming tears that were in his eyes.

Katara looked into his eyes, hoping for answers. She kept holding onto him, now wanting to let go of him, she was too scared to.

" Please.." She was begging now.

_' PLEASE! OZAI! ' His mother scream as another hard crack fo someone smacking her, rang out from behind the door where Zuko stood. _

_He gasped and ran away as Azula stood in the shadows with a sick smile of pleasure. _

Zuko let a single tear escape from his left eye, the scarred one.

" Why wont you tell us what's wrong? "

"..because_ I_ don't even know.." Zuko whispered back to her.

Katara swallowed hard and looked into his troubled eyes.

" I'm _broken _and I'll _never_ heal..why don't you give up _trying_? "

" I wont stop until I know what's wrong with you first! Then I'll try to _fix_ it and I _wont stop_ until I've done that too! " The waterbender held a deep look of wild determination in her eyes, a look of force and independence.

Zuko shook his head sadly and let another tear come out of the other eye.

" Leave it alone Katara..Your only going to get hurt in the end! "

" No..Some people say, I just don't know _when_ to give up.."

**I know, long time no update! Well, I have NOW and I plan to be updating more and more, so please review! (: **


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